constellationprize | [imeeji] INBOX

[ ... leans into the contact, slower than usual, some hesitation to it, but she's - relieved beyond her own ability to grasp at the reception still, that she hasn't been rejected ]

... If you don't want to go there, then we could... instead . . .

. . . Do you want to tell me, instead...?

. . . It's difficult for me to speak of it, as well.

[ with a wry smile ]

But, alright. In terms of how he portrayed it - what he showed you is, mmm . . . That's a little like how Avenger feels.

[ oh.

That makes sense. There's a look of recognition on her face - she seems to get the way it tracks almost immediately, but she stays quiet, just focused on listening, carefully.

Her grip on him's loosened too as she calms, thumb rubbing slow circles over his knuckles, soothing ]

[ taking a deep breath, before he speaks in a distant sort of tone, a storytelling voice ]

When a person has endured something, to the point of breaking - what remains is often a curse. When it is beyond human comprehension, then that curse is impossible to lift.

. . . In truth, Avenger and I are very similar people. That hatred is something we share - that class of his, is one that I am capable of being summoned in as well.

However, I am not an Avenger - and, neither is that person.

[ nods. she didn't think to ask cael's class, but if that's how it works . . . ]

Then there was...

[ rubs at her throat with her free hand, wincing ]

. . . Even if you feel that way, you still love everyone too, don't you...? Even if there are things that you can't forgive, and things you...

Things that you hate - . . . you can't let go of your love any more than you could get rid of that feeling . . .

[ and then there's a pause, hesitant ]

. . . Right?

[ oh - moving to pour her a cup of tea, we have forgotten to take the leaves out ]

Right. I couldn't get rid of that even if I wanted to, and it's the same for him.

[ actually he doesn't know what class caelestis is but whatever ]

Even so, I'm sure . . . He was angry, so he lashed out like that, to try to make you think poorly of him - and poorly of me, maybe.

[ taking it in her free hand, but not drinking just yet. mulling that over, thoughtful ]

He . . .

Is it okay for me to ask something...?

Mm, go ahead.

If we were separated - ... the two of us, or you and Doodle, or Intensity, or... the way that we're separated from Whisky now . . .

If you were separated from someone like that, what would you do?

. . . Mmmm.

If I needed to wait, I would wait for you. If I could look for you, then I would look for you.

I probably wouldn't stop until I found you - and, in all that time, I'd pray to see you again.

Mm. I think - . . .

It's like that. Even if you're similar, you aren't the same, are you...? That boy ... for you . . . since then, you've had lots of different Masters, and you've met lots of people, but he - ... I don't think...

... Other than that person that he met, who he lost - and other than his anger, I think - he was alone, other than that, so a place like this -

I don't think he could endure it . . .

[ a pause, to take a breath ]

Even when that tag . . . even though that happened, it didn't get rid of anything that was there before, so I...

[ with a soft sound ]

Right. ... I suspect as much, too. He is, in other words, a younger version of myself . . .

Even so, my words are true. I know what sort of person I was, when I first came into the world as a Servant.

Mm. I think . . . I think I understand.

[ and save for her hands - holding the cup, holding his hand - she just sort of slumps over onto him, tension fading from her body all at once ]

I'm sorry...

[ :o

forehead flick ]

[ just like

grunts, face scrunching up ]

Why?

About - ... because I... having those feelings...

[ ostensibly this is "sorry I experienced the emotion of hatred for like 12 hours" but it's muffled and her throat's raw and also she is stupid ]

. . . Do you still have them, then?

[ shakes her head ]

After he left, all of it...

. . . That's for the best, then. You shouldn't have to be burdened by those feelings.

[ petting her hair ]

[ weh ]

Is that - okay....?

It is,

[ moving to stroke her cheek, his eyes closing - his brows knit together as he smiles, ]

Completely and absolutely fine.

[ you wanted her to start crying again right

it's quiet, soft, but even with his eyes closed he can feel tears rolling down her cheek, pooling at the edge of his hand ]

[ moving his hand to the back of her head, gently pressing her face to his shoulder ]

[ she sobs a bit longer, still quiet - until the hiccups start. it's just altogether too much, his warmth and scent and his acceptance too, even after all of that, even after everything she did (her opinion),

she clings to him one-armed, still holding on to the tea, and when she eventually calms she settles in against him, nuzzling his shoulder ]

[imeeji] INBOX

ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

1/2

Re: ganba

1/2

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba

Re: ganba