constellationprize | [imeeji] INBOX

Then you don't think I...

[ . . . ]

... No, I guess that's right. I'm pretty useless, right...?

Even if that wasn't true, it's just logical to make sure no one remembers anything, isn't it?

There isn't anyone here who's "useful". Don't misunderstand - it's not about "use".

It's that you can't lie. You won't lie - now, Avenger is the same way, which is why he's agreed to doing this too, but in your case, it's even more extreme than with Avenger.

It's in your nature, and your being as a witch. It isn't a matter of what I think or what I don't - you've made it plain with your own actions and words that this is what you are, and these are your limitations. I'm not going to ask you to do the impossible; I'm not going to ask you to go against yourself.

But, as it stands, your nature as a witch rides directly against my desire for peace. So, I must take action.

[ with a pause ]

Well, though I can't do anything without your consent. The people involved won't have anything to do with anyone being forced into anything, and to be frank, I won't have anything to do with it, either. Even though this solution will neatly fulfill my desires without compromising your position -

If you so truly need those memories as they are, then I won't argue with you. In the first place, even trying to fight for this fragile peace is beyond difficult.

So if you will now stand in my way - just as you have again and again -

. . . Then, there's nothing left to be said on the matter.

I won't use force. I won't ask again. If you won't agree to it, then there's no meaning to even trying.

I didn't say any of that. I didn't say anything like that...

[ folds her hands in her lap, crossing her legs - aiming to take up less space, make herself smaller without changing her position too much ]

... I'm just worried. Just like every other time, I've just been worried about you...

What, precisely, are you worried for me over in this case?

... Even if you remember that you're "not allowed to feed him," you're a really kind person, aren't you? And like you said - ... just like you said, Luci, when you get that way, when you see someone that's hurt - Baritones has been doing really well recently, but it's impossible that they'd never be badly injured from a game again, isn't it?

So even if you remember that you're "not allowed to feed him," won't you end up doing it again someday?

. . . And, with the knowledge you have - just what would you do?

... I don't really know. I'm sorry. But -

That's what I think. It's logical to make sure no one remembers, but I'm worried. Even if there's nothing I can do about it either way, I don't want that to happen to you again...

That has no bearing on whether you remember it or not.

I don't mind it. If you hate it, that's fine. But you said so before, didn't you?

"It doesn't feel right."

It shouldn't feel right - this is certainly unnatural - so it's fine to think as much. But, don't hide behind something like concern for me. This is a flimsy excuse at best.

- It's not an excuse!

. . .

In any case, you've got it wrong. It's not that I'm "not allowed to feed him".

It's that I'm "not allowed to get hurt".

So, even if I were to see him again in such a state, I could only feed him in such a way that did not hurt me. Even then, though, Ruby Sour-san has been taking wonderful care of him already, you know?

...

[ . . . ]

Mm.

[ plays with the hem of her skirt a bit idly, turning her gaze away ]

... Okay.

You have more to say.

[ shakes her head ]

If you're sure it'll be okay, then I trust you.

I'm sorry. I probably made you worry, too.

For what reason do you think I worried?

[ pulling her knees up to her chest, resting her chin there ]

Well, you know, I'm - I'm always being difficult like this, and saying frustrating things...

It's okay. I'll consent.

. . .

Frustrating. . . I don't know if I'd even call it that.

[ with a soft exhale ]

You can hate me for this, you know. But, thank you.

[ sort of muttered into her knees ]

... It wasn't an excuse.

. . . Alright.

It wasn't - why would I hate you for something like this...? I was just worried, but if you're sure things will be okay, then it's fine, isn't it...?

Even so, you can still resent me.

If you don't understand, it's nothing to dwell on.

I don't really know what that means, either... I'm not going to do anything like that. I just -

[ a pause as she swallows, grimacing - she manages to keep her tone controlled enough, soft enough, but there is definitely that like. distinct cracking in her voice, frustrated ]

I wasn't sure at first, and then I realized it was because I was worried...

[ considering that, before exhaling ]

Well, that's no surprise. Dia-sama's always worrying about me, after all.

[ pulls her knees in a little closer ]

... Then why did you say that...?

. . . Words are nothing without actions.

...

[ ]

... If it happens again, then I'll go to Taisho.

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