[imeeji] INBOX

[constellationprize]

Hi! This is ☆radia! I'm really sorry I wasn't able to answer your call... Um, if you need anything, it's fine to leave a message here! I'll answer you as soon as I can!
 

[ for phonecalls and texts ]

Comments

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

I followed him, and - ...

He gave me a chance to leave, but I didn't, and I let him, so . . . it's better if you're mad at me instead, right...?

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

[ with a soft snort ]

I see. So it was wrong of you to believe in someone, and wrong of you to stay for them, and wrong of you to trust in them. I see, I see.

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

[ - goes stiff, alert, pulling away - just enough to make her voice clearer, still not quite looking at his face ]

T-That's not what I meant...! That was ...

... That was why I stayed, because - even though he wouldn't say it, I could tell that he was lonely...

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

Mmmm, I know. I'm asking you, though.

What is it that you did wrong? Is staying for someone who is lonely wrong?

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

[ . . . ]

... No... But -

... If the alternative is... if it's between blaming yourself, or blaming him, or blaming me, then...

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

[ lifts his hand

flicks her forehead. ]

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

[ ?????? ]

W-Wh -

Ouch...!

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

Just what are you trying to put on my soul, by having me blame a person who didn't do anything wrong?

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

That's not what I . . .

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

Isn't that what it is, though? "Blame me, even though all I did was believe im someone."

[ patiently, words paced slow, yet with a sharp tone all the same ]

Then, shall I blame the people who followed me to their deaths, for following me? For trusting in me? If I did not do anything wrong, and they did not do anything wrong, then the blame falls on the party that had faith?

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

That's -

That's not the same.

[ except she knows he'll ask how it's different because she's already done this with doodle so she just goes quiet after murmuring that, pressing close to him again ]

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

Really? Do you truly think so?

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

[ mumble mumble "I'm sorry" ]

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

For, what?

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

Making you make a comparison like that . . . that's not really fair to you, or to those other people, is it...

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

[ . . . exhales ]

Then, stop thinking that way.

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

But it isn't ...

... I don't think ... I wasn't wrong to trust him, but I don't think either of you did anything wrong either, and -

Thinking like that . . . Thinking that way about another version of yourself, thinking that way about yourself . . . even though I already know about it, I just...

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

. . .

There isn't anything that you, nor anyone, can do about that.

[ in a gentle tone, but resolute ]

It's as constant as the sky is above and the earth is below, as unchangeable as gravity.

Please, for your sake and for my sake - trying to do something like this won't relieve me at all. So, stop.

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

. . . I know. I know that, but - both of you ...

[ her fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt, loosely ]

. . . I'm sorry.

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

[ gently, petting her hair again ]

. . . Why are you apologizing?

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

... Even if you say something like that . . . even if I already know, I can't stop. I -

I want you to be happy.

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

I'm not going to be happier if you're the one blamed.

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

. . . Do you have to blame someone?

Re: Day 189

[sancrimony]

. . .

[ sigh ]

Alright, let's stop here.

Re: Day 189

[constellationprize]

[ ah ]

I'm - ...

. . . I'm sorry.